What is this feeling we feel living with BPD?

Time and time again we wake up feeling the same every day. It’s a feeling I can’t shake off. I don’t even think I’m thinking of anything, it’s drilled into my subconscious. What is this feeling we feel living with BPD?

I fear one day I won’t be taking medication anymore which has already screwed with my mind and brain chemicals. Well? Who would I be? Would I be me? This is very scary if you stop and think about it for a minute…

You’ve been thinking and feeling and “living” a certain way for, um, how long now? Now think of NOT living like that anymore, probably not the same way prior so now what? Who will I be?

Who? Me?

These pills have changed me
I’ll never think the way I used to before
I wonder what’ll happen
If one day I just STOP!‚úč

Who will I be? Will I be me?
The person I used to be? Will I recognize if there’s a difference, will others? How will it impact my relationships, feelings, thoughts, actions? I know I have to wait it out. I just wonder…